good afternoon.
yesterday, i wasn't in singapore. i was in malaysia, at a kind of fortune teller place with my grandma, second aunt and mother. and it truly has been a very interesting visit. nevermind the fact that i was hardly surprised at what the guy said, about my studies sure, but about almost everything else, i expected it. with interpretation from mummy and the tour guide, i may be young but i have a lot of frustrations. i wanted to laugh, but i doubt that would have been appropriate so i didn't. don't you think that is quite an accurate description. although i must admit, it sucks that my grandma, second aunt and mother were there. so much for keeping it to myself, argh. and he did say that i should go to church more often. and just when i thought of cutting down on the number of times i step into church. but i guess it is time for a self evaluation and reforming habits, bad ones anyway. i guess there will always come a point in a person's life when you have to sit down and think about your life so far, and how it's going to go on from there on. and seeing as how this is the next major turning point in my life, i really should sit down and think about it. think about everything.
he also pointed out that i don't take breakfast. and so, i'm starting to take breakfast. will probably start skipping lunch, and have dinner instead. as well as starting my swimming sessions with mummy. twice a week. i really need to do something to get my mind off the hassles of work and not to mention, my life. hahas. but yes, i'm going to start eating breakfast. hahas. funny isn't it? amanda starts eating breakfast after seeing a fortune teller. now you know why people call me weird.
he also happen to touch on my love life. it would be much better for me to concentrate on my studies now, than to look of a guy. and looking back at recent developments, i think that is the best solution. i doubt i have stopped believing in love, but i think i really do need the break. there is only so many times a girl's heart can take a beating. and besides, there hasn't been anyone who has caught my eye. but yes, even if there is someone who has caught my eye, we'll be friends for now. because if sleeping beauty could sleep for a hundred years, my true love should be able to wait another five years or so for me, right?
he said i worked hard at school. and i almost laughed, but i caught myself. if i had worked so hard at school, why am i sitting here, fearing the worst when my results come out? why when thinking about my future, all i can think of is me slogging for the rest of my life and never being able to give my mother the life that she deserves? i still don't know what i am going to do about my studies. to continue, or not to continue. i have discussed this with a few people. if i don't make it, i might go to poly and take a course either in accounts, finance or early childhood. and if i do make it, the first thing i'll do is go to church and thank god. but because i hardly have any confidence that i will pass, i'm thinking of the ways i can go after the results come out. i can either continue studying, in poly. or i could continue working, and save enough money before going to poly. or maybe i'll take an accounting course in another school, just for the diploma. i've run out of options, but you see, only the option of me working will bring in money. everything else requires money to be spent, and in huge amounts. i really think i should stop spending, and start saving for that diploma or poly education. because i know that on my mother's pay alone, there is no way i could get through poly or even a diploma course. but we'll see how it goes. i'm still quite amazed that he said i study hard. but then again, maybe i do and i'm just dumb that's why studying doesn't help. *sigh*
well, i guess that was about it. but the trip was interesting though. the bus was way cool, and i slept about half the time we were in the bus. but i managed to finish my book, in one day. but looking at how my typing has been coming along, i doubt i'll be able to finish one book per day any more. maybe i'll start with one book in two days. but we'll see how. after the 31st jan, it will go back to borrowing 4 books per card. maybe it's a good thing i guess, work more, play less. anyhow, talking about work. i got my first pay check! although it will go to paying for the hongkong trip, it's a total rush to get your first pay check! hahas. i'm crazy, i know.
anyhow, i'm going out with ben and whoever else tags along tomorrow. haven't seen that guy in
eons! anyhow, it'll be interesting tomorrow. hahas. and i might go for mass, seeing as how on sunday it's macho's 1st death anniversary and we got to attend the ceremony. hmm, i'm running out of things to blog. i'll be going for mass tonight, scared heart devotion. after that, it's heading home to watch tv! inuyasha. *swoons* i can't believe i'm swooning over an anime character. hahas. well, i better get going. i'll blog again another day. thanks for reading, do take care of yourself. *hugs* please do tag! don't be a silent reader (: loveya!
<3 you always
