be careful, you might lose something important

"be not afraid of life. believe that life is worth living and your belief will help create the fact." william james

"be not afraid of greatness. some men are born great, some achieve greatness and some have greatness thrust upon them." william shakesphere

"appreciation can make a day, even change a life. your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary." margaret cousins

"those who can laugh without a cause have either found the true meaning of happiness or have gone stark raving mad." norm papernick

wishes are a dream your heart makes

straight 'a's for my 'a' level.
cd player cum radio.
a set of close and really good friends.
flat screen monitor.
creative zen.
memory cards for my digi cam.
charms for my charm bracelet.
head phones.
more books for my reading pleasure.
playboy print wallet.
jars of clay cd.
corset top with lace and strings.
that special somone to brighten up my day.

Monday, March 05, 2007

loving you at 11:24 PM

i seriously don't feel like applying for university anymore.

i don't know why, but it just feels so meaningless.

everything feels so meaningless now.

all i want to do is sit in a corner and rot to death.

seriously.

i work from 9am till 6pm.

and with the APAIE conference now, it'll be from 7.30am till late.

so this week is burnt.

and everyone keeps telling me i need to start applying for university.

i've got no time, dammit.

i'm still not getting any sleep at night.

the nightmares just wouldn't leave me alone.

i just feel like crying and scaring my nightmares away with the tears.

wash it away with the tears.

drown them with my tears.

but it wouldn't work, would it?

nothing ever works for me anymore.

my mood's rock bottom, and no, things can't only get better.

because it's getting worse every fucking second.

i want to cry.

but crying is so useless, meaningless, weak.

amanda will not cry.

i should go now.

lie in bed and hopefully i don't start crying.

good night.

and maybe, goodbye.

<3 you always

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the girl
~amanda germaine~
~~eighteen~~ going on nineteen
ijian. cjcian.
cancer. 23june1988.
single, ~~available~~ and enjoying every minute of it!